This website uses cookies so that we can provide you with the best user experience possible. Cookie information is stored in your browser and performs functions such as recognising you when you return to our website and helping our team to understand which sections of the website you find most interesting and useful.
And Finally
Brand’s Bieber smack plan
By CMU Editorial | Published on Friday 16 April 2010
Forget piracy rules and new business models, Russell Brand has told Rolling Stone that he reckons heroin could save the music industry.
Though his theory is based on the principle that if the whole of planet pop got hooked on the drug, it’s the tedious teeny pop types who would most likely fall down first. So, Brand’s smack habit plan is more about saving the rest of us from having to suffer the Cyruses and Biebers of this world, rather than overcoming all those record label losses. Because, after all, the plan would make the label’s losses worse, what with no Cyrus/Bieber money to fall back on and a record expenditure on the drugs budget (not that labels have such things, obviously).
Anyway, speaking to the music mag Brand joked thus: “The top of the hit parade would look very different if teenyboppers were exposed to heroin. It would weed a lot of them out. I don’t think Justin Bieber could handle Syd Barrett from Pink Floyd’s habit. A lot of people in their journey to rehab overdose, and then, perhaps, we could be spared their awful music. It’s Darwinian. It’s the law of natural selection”.
But while Brand is trying to send Bieber into a drug induced early death, his fiancée Katy Perry seems to want to care for the squeaky pop boy. She tweeted a link highlighting Justin to her other half this week with the message: “Hey… I know we’re getting hitched + all but I was wondering if u’d be open 2 the idea of adopting 1st? I have an idea. Whata bout this cute lil one? I’m sure he could use a great home!!!”
I’d imagine adoption agencies would frown upon someone trying to adopt a child they’d suggested should get hooked on heroin. The more upmarket ones, anyway.
