And Finally Beef Of The Week

CMU Beef Of The Week #59: Katy Perry v Calvin Harris

By | Published on Sunday 3 April 2011

Katy Perry

Calvin Harris pulled out of Katy Perry’s tour of the UK and Ireland just as it was about to begin earlier this week. What would be the most professional way to announce this. How about by picking a fight on Twitter? Yeah, that would probably do it.

Perry tweeted ahead of the first gig in Dublin on Monday that “Calvin Harris will NOT be joining in on the fun and has CANCELLED last minute”.

Calvin responded by telling his own followers: “Sorry to all who wanted to see me with Katy – her team suddenly moved the goalposts and I was to appear on stage with no production”.

To which Katy replied: “The goalpost seems to be perfectly fine for New Young Pony Club, Yelle, Robyn, Marina & The Diamonds, to name a few. Or how about Janelle Monáe and her sixteen piece band… It’s fine, I’m used to you cancelling on me, it’s become your staple!”

Oh dear. This continued on for a while, with Harris explaining: “It would have looked shit, sounded shit – trust me you would have been more disappointed SEEING the show than you are with me cancelling. Her show is AWESOME, you’ll have an amazing time without me (especially without me DJing on a cardboard box in front of a pink curtain). I’m really sorry Katy Perry, I’m just upset because I really wanted to play but your team made it impossible. We tried really hard to sort it out, but playing side of stage for 30 minutes, it seemed pointless me even being there. Didn’t intend to cause offence or upset anybody”.

Then, as is the norm in such situations, Katy Perry’s fans spent the next twelve hours telling Calvin to kill himself. Yay the internet!